Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
