Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
