I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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