he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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