So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
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