i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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