Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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