ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I think I died a long time ago.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
