with your own penis?
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
