i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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