the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
