he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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