woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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