Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.