Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
