Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
