Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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