Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
