and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Randomize
