i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
