Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I FOUND THE LEGS
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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