I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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