Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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