I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
