Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
