so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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