Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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