tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
operation harelip BJ is a go
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.