I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
