is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
