I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize