they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
