I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I love having hate sex.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
These 21 Declassified Government Horrors Are Unimaginable
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped