I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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