i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
