Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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