I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
