Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
too bad you live with your parents still
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
