Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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