Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
