Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
