Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize