No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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