you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
