Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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