Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
