What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize