I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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