fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
