Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize